Beyond the BBQ:
Enjoying Social Events with a Feeding Tube
Being at a picnic or BBQ with an enteral feeding tube can be hard.[1] But with some planning you can become more confident and enjoy yourself. Here are some tips that may help:
- Plan ahead
Tell the host before the event
If they know why you are not eating, they will not keep offering food. So it can help everyone feel less awkward. Let them know about your needs so they can give you practical help. They may give you a private place to feed if you need it.
Think about timing
If you want to feed in private, do this before or after the main meal. This can help you feel less left out or rushed.
Bring what you need
Pack your feeding supplies, like formula, water, syringes, and any medicine.[1] Use a small cool bag if your feeds need to be kept cold.[1] A backpack is a great idea if you want to feed on the go. You can hide your feed inside. It is also easier than using a drip pole.[2]
- Adapt to the social setting
Practice what to say
If people ask why you are not eating, then you could say “I have a feeding tube for medical reasons and eat through my tube. I’m just happy to be here and I’m enjoying the company!”[1]
Try to join in
Even if you are not eating in the usual way, you can still take part. Ask about their food, talk about shared interests, or help with setting up or serving.
Have something to sip
If you’re allowed, a drink can help you feel included.
- Find other ways to join in
Help the host
Being involved in cooking or serving can help you feel a part of occasion.
Bring something to share
Taking a game, a music playlist, or picnic blanket can help take the focus away from food.
Enjoy the environment
Enjoy the fresh air, family, friends, and any games people are playing.
- Look after your mental health
Be kind to yourself
It is normal to feel left out sometimes. But remember that socializing is about more than just food. It is about spending time with people, having great conversations, and strengthening relationships.
Guard Your Thoughts
You will have to intentionally guard your thoughts and look for positives since there is always something to be thankful for. Change your focus from what you cannot do to what you can do. You can participate in this event and be grateful for the people you are spending time with. You can… (Fill in this blank for yourself. What else can you do?)
Change the subject
If you do not like to talk about your feeding tube, move the topic to shared interests or perhaps a funny story.[1]
Talk to someone close
Having a friend or family member who understands your situation can make things easier.
[1] PINNT Top Tips Guide – Living with an enteral tube
[2] Martin et al. BMC Gastroenterology 2012, 12:126
